Thursday, July 30, 2009

GO TO WWW.HAIKUEWE.COM

Hi!

There will no longer be Haiku Ewe updates on this blog. To stay hip to the Ewe, please visit www.haikuewe.com and bookmark it!

See you there!
-Al

Monday, July 27, 2009

Point Doooooom

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New post at www.haikuewe.com: Point Dooooom (give or take an "o")

Please be sure to bookmark haikuewe.com right away as this blog will not be updated after Friday, July 31.

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Friday, July 24, 2009

Chinese Balls

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Fresh post today at www.haikuewe.com: Chinese Balls

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Tuesday, July 21, 2009

HaikuEwe.com

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Hi! I published a new post at www.HaikuEwe.com today!


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Friday, July 17, 2009

WordPress ComicPress The Jets

Today, I am going to my friend's house and she is going to help me figure out WordPress and ComicPress. Yes. I really am that stupefied. I don't exactly know how it happened, but WordPress grabbed me by the shoulders and headbutted me.

I am not even totally sure I know how to upload images since I somehow managed to change the naming convention but WordPress collaborated on the change (uninvited) thereby rendering the new naming convention unknowable.

I think a happy life is one spent without ever having seen a person getting decapitated or PHP. Fortunately, I've managed to avoid the former, but the latter has plagued me for years. And now PHP has joined WordPress's gang. So, while WordPress was headbutting me, PHP was pantsing me.

My dream is for haikuewe.com to have a little logo across the top and a little sketch underneath and the blog underneath that. I'm a simple dreamer. I don't even want to figure out the side columns. But every time I go to the blog's dashboard there are WordPress and PHP. Waiting. Snapping. Like the Jets. Soon they'll dance around in a mock gang fight and just when I trip over my two left feet and fall to the ground, PHP will stab me in the stomach and WordPress will toss a cigarette on me.

Well, thank you to my friend who will hopefully help me decipher the PHP. Perhaps it will be us stabbing them in the stomach? Does that make us the Sharks?

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Zee Splint! She Eez Off!


Six more weeks of therapy twice each week and I should be good as new, or at least close. Hooray! The splint is off during the day. I still need to wear it at night.

Drawing has been unsightly. My pinky is still ridiculously week and shaky but the strength will build back up. And until then, I hope fans will forgive some jiggly drawings. I have completed two (count em! TWO!) whole strips in the past four days.

My drawings will be back starting in August. Until then, everyone gets to enjoy the fabulous artwork of Imagine This creator Lucas Turnbloom (this week), Chad Frye, Illustration Guy (next week) and contest winner Valerie Waters!

Facebook DOESN'T Allow Hate Groups!!!

Yay Facebook! They finally took down the hate page that was targeting my sister!! And it only took the threat of a legal action. It's gone! Hooray!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Facebook Allows Hate Groups

I found a Facebook hate group which was created specifically to target my sister, a teacher. Facebook refuses to take the page down. That horrifies and angers me.

Under the "Safety" section of the Facebook terms and conditions, #6 reads "You will not post content that is hateful, threatening, pornographic, or that contains nudity or graphic or gratuitous violence." The group is a clear violation Facebook's own terms and conditions.

I don't think I want to participate in a network that would not only allow a hate group targeting a specific teacher to stay live but would disable everyone from taking it down.

So tonight I am going to close my FB accounts. Just wanted to give everyone a heads up. Instead, you can find Haiku Ewe on Twitter and on the blog: www.haikuewe.com.

Monday, July 13, 2009

www.HaikuEwe.com!


For a little while (how long? I know not) I will double post both here and there. At some point I will make the big switcharoo and take this blog down. But that's quite a commitment and so it won't be for a while. Commitment is scary.

For now, I am trying to decide on a look (enter scary commitment again) and figure out how to arrange all the doohickies and figure out what all the doohickies dohick. Any suggestions or help any of you are willing to offer will be greatly appreciated.

I used to be a web desinger but that was three years ago. Three years is the equivalent of 6 lifetimes in web design years. Plus, I hated it and so I never researched the trends. I am a web design dinosaur. That doesn't phase me until I try to put together a blog/site thing for Haiku Ewe.

But! I will conquer this! PHP be damned! I will conquer this!!

#1 as of 10:19 AM PT

Lucas Turnbloom is drawing Haiku Ewe all week. Today is the first day you can see his brilliant work. It took us all the way to #1 most read comic today on gocomics this morning! Go Lucas go!!

Be sure to check out his strip, Imagine This!

Friday, July 10, 2009

The Debate

I'm having a hard time allowing myself to be light and whimsical. Perhaps I should listen to less BBC podcasts. A voice in my head asks, "How can you write such drivel when there are people like Neda dying in Iran? Can you imagine what some people are enduring right now in Zimbabwe as you sit in your air conditioned home and pontificate imaginary cases of Club Lamb Fungus?"

And then another voice (there are several) says, "Yes! That is exactly WHY you must create the diversion from the stress. That is what comics are all about. They are the split second break from real life that enables people to take a breath and get back into the fight."

"Are you really that self important, cartoonist?" chides voice #3. (Man I can't stand this one. It’s the same voice that suggests I buy the moldy strawberries because the ripe ones deserve to be eaten by classier people.)

Voice #2: "It's not a matter of self importance, it's a matter of understanding the point of your craft. It's a matter of realizing that your art serves a purpose."

Voice #3: "Oh brother. We are talking about cartoons!"

Voice #4: "If they are so meaningless, then why are they so popular?"

Voice #1: "Escapism! People are avoiding reality because it's hard and they want easy."

Voice #3: "Seriously. Haiku Ewe is about as important to the human condition as a knock-off Prada bag."

Voice #13: "My toenails are painted green!"

Voice #6: “Ya know, life in the US is a lot harder than we get credit for. We aren’t all fat, lazy Paris Hilton fans. Some of us care and work hard to help others.”

Voice #5: “Totally. The economy has us all terrified for our careers and houses. Everything I have worked so hard to build might come crashing down. Oh who am I kidding. I can’t even afford a house. And my hand is messed up. My life stinks!”

Voice #1: “Who cares if you can afford a house if the government bombs it!”

Voice #4: “Weren’t we debating the importance of cartoons?”

Voice #3: “More evidence to support my ongoing hypothesis that you are an easily distracted moron.”

Voice #2: “Aw that’s not very nice. You are great the way you are.”

Voice #3: “Look over there! A puppy!”

Voice #13: “What?! Yay!! Where?!”

Voice #3: “I rest my case.”

Voice #5: “Man, that is so unfair. I hate it when you do that.”

Voice #7: “All right! That’s enough! Voices 1-3, 5, and 13 zip it. Cartoons are good. People need to laugh. There is a time and a place for activism. That time and place is not Haiku Ewe. Let’s move on.”

Voice #13: “May I say something?”

Voice #7: (glare)

Voice #13: “I’m hungry.”

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Another Drawing Attempt

Today, Haiku Ewe does a little celebratory jump because my drawing is getting better and better. It's slow going, but it's rewarding to see that I'm able to navigate this blasted splint. It comes off on July 20 and Haiku Ewe will surely find some purple lilies as a delicious celebratory treat. Why do we eat when we celebrate? Odd. Yummy, but odd.


Club Lamb Fungus


Hello beloved Haiku Ewe fans!

Today I want to talk about ringworm. It sounds gross ... and it is, but it is also fascinating to learn about ailments that visit farms. Ringworm in sheep is called Club Lamb Fungus. Appetizing, oui?

Usually, sheep catch Club Lamb Fungus/Ringworm from ... wait for it ... cows. Stupid. Jerk. Obnoxious. Cows. They have the world so snowed. Everyone thinks cows are sooo cute and they buy their little cow milk pitchers and their little cow bells and their little paintings of cow noses. Blegch. I'm with Haiku Ewe. They are a stain on our society.

Anyhoo, prevention of ringworm can be rough. Unfortunately, since Haiku Ewe and some stupid jerk cows have had ringworm, the farmer will likely be spraying them with some crazy concoctions.

Soon Haiku Ewe will be back to her old self. Though not as soon as she'd like and not as soon as you'd think.

Thank you to Danke Club Lambs and Livestock of Minford, Ohio for letting me rip these images.

If Club Lamb Fungus fascinates you and you'd like to read more ... then you got dropped as a child. No seriously, I was going to add some links here, but that is crazy. Even the people who are having to physically deal with sheep who have this don't want to know more about it. They just want to get rid of it.

So, really I am saving you from yourself by not giving you any links. I suppose you can still Google or GoodSearch "Club Lamb Fungus" but at least you won't be able to say that I encouraged your twisted research in any way.

Oh man, I think I need a nap.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

#4!!!

Wooohooo!!! FOURTH most read on gocomics today!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Top 10 again!

I made the gocomics top 10 most read today list again! hee hee!!

Honorable Mentions

Yipe! I said I'd post honorable mentions today and promptly forgot until 4:30 PM PT. My excuse: I live in downtown LA and the Staples Center is about 5 blocks from us. Michael Jackson's funeral was held there today. I did not attend. It's not a good excuse, but hopefully it will distract you long enough that I can sneak away.

Here are the honorable mentions...
Please notice the facial expression on the sheep next to the farmer. Lol! Richie Bauer sent in this drawing and you can see more of his work on the Saatchi Gallery.


Mickel Yantz, creator of the webcomic NutCracks sent this one in. I noticed that Haiku Ewe is conspicuously absent from his "Comics I Read" list. Whattup with that? Lol! But check out the colors and the cool shading.

Monday, July 6, 2009

The Winner: Valerie Waters!!

My friends, it is always hard to pick just one winner. But, c'est la vie, non? Ahh mais oui. Coq au vin. Okay, enough French.

Thank you so so so much to everyone who entered the contest. It was exciting and fun to watch entries roll in. The judging was a little more heart wrenching though. All of you who sent in drawings deserve a big pat on the back, and I'm giving you one in my head right now.

Valerie Waters is the winner of the Draw Haiku Ewe For A Week Contest! She sent in a great submission that made me lol, for real, not just typing it to type it. You will get to see her submission on July 27 and then her other drawings all through the week until July 31.

The runner up is Mary Barclay a.k.a. Shikamoo MB who sent in several delightful drawings. Should Valerie find herself unable to fulfill her duties as Illustrator Of Haiku Ewe For A Week, then the crown will fall into the hands of Mary. Therefore, I shall not display their drawings so as not to ruin the surprise.

Tomorrow, I will display drawings from a couple of honorably mentioned artists who threw their brushes into the ring.

Thank you again everyone!!!!!
-Al

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Lazy and Timid Sunday

Okay! Submissions are in. Now comes the hard part. I don't want to make anyone sad but there can only be one winner. I'm so nervous about this part that I have only looked at one submission. But I will announce a winner tomorrow.

There are so many lovely ways to procrastinate: books, naps, movies, strawberries, walks, zone-outs, and tweets. Well, I'd better get started!

Friday, July 3, 2009

Midnight Deadline

Today is the last day for everyone to get submissions to me for the contest to draw Haiku Ewe for a week. The deadline is midnight tonight. I'll announce the winner on Monday.

Thank you to the folks who have sent in drawings! It means a lot to both Haiku Ewe and me that you took the time to do that. I will be available to the winner night and day ... well, maybe just day. But I'll be available! And I will help you as much as I can. Though you may not want me to as my drawing is still kind of funky.

Thank you to everyone and good luck and good show!

Thursday, July 2, 2009

7th on Gocomics.com!!!!

Ohmytotallygosh!! Haiku Ewe is the 7th most read comic on gocomics today! What a great week this has been!! (Don't forget that the contest deadline is tomorrow at midnight!)

enter the contest! whee!!

deadline tomorrow at midnight!